Healing the Force - Chapter 43 Yavin IV Part 1

Jaden’s breath gusted out as the door to her quarter’s snicked shut behind her.  She was tired of being exhausted.  No, more than exhausted, she was – was there a stronger word than exhausted, she thought as she sat on the bunk.  Impotent? No, helpless.

Canderous gave her ten minutes, after Atton walked away, before he stormed into the cockpit and demanded to know about Atton’s connection to the keys.  She couldn’t shake feeling disloyal as she told him about D’Nara, but Canderous had a right to know.

“Is that why he almost killed you?”

Jaden shook her head.  “They, the dark masters, took over by flooding his alignment with the dark side.  They used to do it to me when I was younger.  Part of the training, they claimed.  It’s like an out of body experience.  You see yourself doing . . .” she let her voice trail off and took a deep breath.  “It’s a struggle to overcome but it can be done.”

They spoke for a few more minutes before he told her to get some sleep.  She thought about going to Atton, but changed her mind.  Jaden would be able to monitor him through the Force so she left him alone to come to terms with what he had learned.

Sitting on the bunk, she took a deep cleansing breath before carefully constructing barriers around her mind.  She retreated to a place within herself where the Masters couldn’t hear her thoughts.  Jaden hadn’t been here in years but arriving now gave her a sense of peace, despite the cold and pain of the dark side.

Here, she could admit to being worried what would happen next.  The dark masters were angrier than what they should have been.  Taking control of Atton was proof of that.  And it made no sense.  Yes, technically, Atton did belong to the dark side based on the agreement between the Midiclorians and the six who buried the keys, but his light side tendencies were not strong enough to warrant such a fierce reaction, regardless of his strength in the Force.  No, she sighed, something else was going on, but it would have to wait.  Jaden desperately needed to find her center and this was the place to do it.

Even though the Masters couldn’t hear her, Jaden could still feel and listen to the universe around her.  It was times like these that she sought out the good in the galaxy. She pulled close the innocent laughter of children, the soft breezes rustling through trees, and the carefree play of baby Gizka’s, letting it elevate her spirit.  This ability was one of the first she discovered missing when she restored Carth’s life and one she went looking for the second time she joined with him.

Jaden hadn’t heard from him in more than a day, but she knew he was busy with meetings and planning the Republics’ defense.  However, he was never far from her as she had reopened herself to the Voice.  Reaching out now, Jaden found it, exhausted, worried, and lonesome.  Slightly moving the fingers on her left hand, she pulled it close.  She was confident it wouldn’t take long for him to recognize her now that he knew, and maintaining her barriers, Jaden answered his call.

To say she was surprised by his question was a bit of an understatement.  So when he asked what she was wearing, Jaden looked down the length of her - his shirt, her pants, and, she wiggled her toes, his socks.  Hey, they had made up after all, right.  Instinctively she knew he didn’t want to talk about anything serious, so she answered the way she had.  “Not a damn thing,” she purred in a smoky, sultry voice, “but thoughts of you.”  His frustrated groan had her grinning.

The Masters had told her that once he was healed, he would begin to regain pieces of his former self.  Jaden never figured comm-sex being a part of that – not that that’s what happened – but still.  No, they spoke nothing about the current situation, instead talking about Mission Vao and how proud he was of his ‘doctor daughter’.  Carth had adopted the young Twi’lek in his heart and that had been official enough for both of them.  It pleased Jaden to know that one lost soul, no matter how strong, had a home.

They laughed over outrageous stories of the trouble he got into with Kwyn and he told her how ridiculously shy Dustil was being when he was around this girl he liked.  Carth was beginning to despair he would never have grandkids because his son wouldn’t get off his ass and ask her out.  It was all so . . . normal and she realized she needed it just as much as he did.  Their casual conversation didn’t take away from the drama or the seriousness of the mission.  If anything it was a subtle reminder of what they fought for, why they had to succeed.  And for Jaden, she knew what she had to do next.

Toward the end of their conversation, the talk turned more intimate and quiet.  When Jaden finally disconnected she felt at peace and contented.  The Voice was quiet as well and she slipped away to let it sleep.

As she deconstructed her barriers as carefully as she had built them, she was confident a dreamless sleep would come easily.  She took a few moments for a luxurious stretch before opening her eyes to find herself immersed in a maelstrom of darkness.

~~ Gotcha! ~~

Jaden fell from the bunk to her knees, grabbing the side of her head as icy tendrils of pain snaked their way through her brain.  From there, it pooled at the base of her skull to explode through all her nerve endings.  Her scream was high pitched and agonizing.  “Atton!”

~~ Scream all you want silly girl, no one can hear you. ~~

~~ Wh – why are you doing this? ~~ The words were raspy and broken. ~~ Why? ~~

~~ To teach you a lesson, why else. ~

Jaden leaned forward as she wrapped her arms around her middle.  ~~ I’ve done nothing! ~~

~~ You tried to take what is ours.  We heard what you told him about the woman. ~~

~~ He had a right to know. ~~ She fought to drag air into her lungs as panic sweat trickled down her back.

~~ You were trying to influence him. ~~ Their voices turned whiny  ~~ Oh she was a good person Jaq, just as you are. ~~

~~ I told him the truth! ~~

~~ He is the son of D’Nara and therefore ours! ~~

Jaden concentrated on blocking the pain racing through her.  Every pulse point throbbed as her muscles weakened.  ~~ Then return what is mine, ~~ she snarled.

~~ Yours? ~~

~~ Zared. ~~ Their burst of laughter grated over her skin like a coarse file.  ~~ He belonged to me. ~~

~~ Silly girl, ~~ they chuckled once before snapping, ~~ nothing belongs to you. ~~

~~ He belonged to the light! ~~

~~ Yes, until he cut himself off from the Force. ~~

~~ You manipulated him! ~~

~~ We simply gave him a purpose for the power he had trapped within. ~~

~~ You stole what was mine! ~~

Jaden screamed again as a fresh round of pain washed over her.  There was no light now, no laughter to soothe her.  The echo of misery and death beat at her, clawed at her heart, and snapped at her body.  The faces of those Zared and the True Sith had murdered swam in her vision, frozen in the horrified moment when they realized death was at hand.

~~ Release the child! ~~

The grotesque tableau behind her closed eyes lessened as the pain receded.  She sucked air into her constricted lungs as she curled into a fetal position on the floor, giving into the urge to whimper.

~~ The child has done nothing but tell the truth. ~~

~~ She has defied the agreement made with the key bearers. ~~

“No,” she whispered as she began rocking back and forth.  “I told the truth.”

~~ Child, you know you cannot interfere with the accords and what has passed. ~~

~~ I only told the truth. ~~

~~ You, silly girl, were influencing him, ~~ they sneered.

Jaden’s heart rate was beginning to level, her breathing becoming easier.

~~ Enough! ~~ The light masters snapped in a rare show of temper.  ~~ Leave her be. ~~

~~ She . . . ~~

~~ Is ours at the moment, and you will not harm her now or in the future.  The embodier’s welfare is both our responsibilities.  The child is an instrument of the Force.  You know harming her is forbidden. ~~

An icy chill permeated her body.  The instrument for his final fall.  They were quiet words and Jaden wasn’t sure she even heard them through the roar of blood rushing in her ears.

~~ They are gone, child. ~~

Jaden shook her head and whispered.  ~~ They did something to me. ~~

~~ We have warned you of your vulnerability when you lock yourself away as you did. ~~

~~ Cold, ~~ she murmured.

~~ It is the dark side of Yavin IV.  You may not feel a great deal of pain since you are stronger, but the dark will manifest itself in other ways.  We cannot help that. ~~

Jaden uncurled her body slowly, stood, and made her way to the refresher.  She was going to be sick.

~~ Child? ~~

~~ Just . . . leave me alone. ~~

Pain continued to pound through her as she shuffled toward the shower, using whatever was available to propel her forward.  Her breathing was labored and shallow as she fought back the tears that threatened.  They hadn’t just hurt her, the dark masters had violated her, raped her with their cruelty.  Her fingers shook as she stripped off her clothes, her throat aching from the ragged breaths.  When she was naked, she cautiously stepped into the shower and let the needle-like spray of the scalding water wash over her.

Bastards!  There was no call for their attack.  She had done nothing wrong but tell the truth.  She knew better than anyone did, that Atton’s dark side tendencies were always there, shifting under the surface in his subconscious.  That’s why he fell so quickly on Onderon and why he set aside the trappings of the Jedi so nonchalantly.  Yes, he was a scoundrel at heart, yet he balanced those tendencies with well-hidden compassion.  Atton despised injustice and while he may exude a devil-may-care attitude about many things, if someone or something got past his carefully crafted illusion, he would lay down his life to preserve what was precious to him.

Maybe that was it, she thought as she slid to the floor and huddled in the corner, the water continuing to beat against her skin.  Atton didn’t play by the rules and so the dark masters lashed out at her, thinking she was responsible.  I’m not,” she whispered as the sobs finally took over, demanding release.  “I’m not!”

*************************

HK was the one to wake her the following morning, complaining bitterly that he was unable to kill the ‘meatbag Jedi’ for attacking her.  “Irritated Statement:  How can I protect you Master, if you continue to put restrictions on my primary function?”

“Keep it up,” she snapped, “and ‘Hunter/Killer’ will become,” she absently waved her hand in aggravation, “Happy Kisser.”  Jaden knew she wasn’t being fair to the droid but his personal resentment wasn’t her concern at the moment.

After she had managed to bring her emotions under control last night, she had brought up the timeline and studied it.  There was a point, just weeks in the future that pulsed ominously across all lines.  It hadn’t been that noticeable before since the timeline generally had thousands of them but if enough separate events lead to the same result it would show clearly.  Jaden didn’t bother to bring it up.  It would show her and Zared battling it out, not the outcome.  Her job was making sure the pulsing turned to a steady white point.

“You and T3 are to stay on the ship,” she said handing him a datapad, “and follow my orders.”  HK said nothing as he left the room.

As Jaden dressed, the thick, greasy ball of darkness rolled in her gut like a bomb.  She had gone back a few hours on the time line and replayed the attack of the dark side.  The instrument of his final fall.  They were setting Atton up by using her, knowing that if she interfered they could punish her further.  It still made no sense.  The already had Zared.  They didn’t need Atton except to cause her pain.  Or distract her.

She sat on the bunk, pulling on her boots.  Atton needed to be watched, but she couldn’t let him touch her.  Tricky but doable, she hoped.  This was step one of her plan to end this fracking nightmare – deny the dark masters by keeping him on the path of the light side.

As Jaden approached the bridge, she heard Atton’s voice.

“I’m just saying . . .”

“Utapau.”

“Sure.  Pau-pau-pau-Uta-pau-pau-pau,” he sang somewhat off-key. “Sounds better than Yaaavin.”  His nasally whine scraped over her still raw skin but didn’t stop her chuckle.

Resilient, came to Jaden’s mind as she reached out to find Atton in the Force.  His mind was sealed up tighter than an airlock, but the tension she felt the night before had abated.

Canderous sat in the copilot’s chair as Atton flew the Ebon Hawk just above the trees of Yavin IV.  A grouping of Massassi temples could be seen in the distance.  Below them Jaden could see the wreckage and remnants of ships and the battle waged here by Ulic Qel-Droma and the Republic against Exar Kun.  She had told Atton her predecessor was a bit of an ass, but that had been an understatement.  He was partially responsible for the Great Sith War and Exar Kun’s fall to the dark side.

~~ He was quite masterful at deceit as well. ~~

The dark masters were back and something nasty shifted within her.  They wouldn’t win, not this time.  ~~ I wonder where he learned that. ~~ She responded snidely.

~~ Silly, silly girl.  It was only a bit of fun. ~~

~~ Mindless death and destruction always is. ~~

~~ Yes, Darth Tyr, enabler of Revan it was, wasn’t it.  I wonder what your lover would think of that. ~~ Jaden closed her eyes.  ~~ Isn’t it hypocritical to judge others when there is blood on your hands as well? ~~

~~ But not by my choice as it was his. ~~

~~ Bah!  Even proxy decisions have consequences, silly girl. ~~

“This is it,” Canderous said.

“There was a clearing a few clicks back, I’ll set us down there,” Atton said turning to her.  Beneath the carefully camouflaged hurt was anger and apprehension.  The confidence in his decision to follow the light had been shaken.  “We’ll contact you when we have the key and you can pick us up,” he added.

“I’m going with you.”  Her voice was quiet, straining against her heartache.

“I’m surprised you’re even standing being this close to this much dark side energy.”

Set it aside, she told herself at his accusatory tone.  “You want to face Exar Kun on your own if he decides to show up?”

“Kun’s dead.  How much trouble can his spirit cause,” Canderous asked watching the two of them as the tension washed over him.

“You’d be surprised.  Besides, we’re about to take one of the reasons he’s here in the first place.  I’d fight if I was him.”  Atton raised a brow.  “I’ll be fine.  The joinings with Carth have made me stronger.”  Plus, what I took from Zared will help me use the darkness of the tombs.

The inside pocket of her jacket began to vibrate.  Jaden excused herself, went to the small comm room, and shut the door.  “Good morning,” she said after digging the small unit from her pocket.

She heard Carth’s hesitation.  “Everything all right?  You sound . . . tired.”

And in pain, and pissed, and cold, she sighed.  “Someone kept me up last night, but I’ll be fine.  We’re getting ready to land.  What’s going on there?”

Jaden could hear the frustration in his voice as he explained what had transpired.  She couldn’t blame him.  Zared’s fleet was numerous so stretching the Republic thin was rather easy.  “The shipping lanes are in chaos, several systems have stopped transporting goods.  Manaan is now under his control.  He’s hit Sleheyron -.”

“Sleheyron?” she asked interrupting.

“Yeah.  Jaden, he’s going after Telos.”  She didn’t need to be joined with him to hear his dismay.  The voice echoed it within her.  “We’re sending reinforcements to Citadel Station but it won’t be enough, will it.”

Jaden tipped her head back and closed her eyes.  “Carth . . .”

“Why didn’t you tell me he breached your defenses?  And that the he could do that because of me and what I did.”  It was said in a hurried manner.

“You’ve done nothing,” she sighed.  ~~ Why did you tell him? ~~

“Well, I beg to differ, but I don’t want to argue with you right now.”

Jaden chuckled.  “There’s a first.”

“Yeah, well apparently I’m freaking my son out, too.”

Jaden heard the reluctant smile in his voice.  “The new and improved Carth Onasi?”

“I’m working on it,” he said quietly.  “I only had a few minutes, but I wanted to check in with you this morning since we didn’t talk about any of this last night.  Thanks, by the way,” he said softly.  “I needed to set this all aside and have something ordinary.  We’ll talk about the rest when you get home.”

“Sure,” she answered forcing her voice to sound normal.She sat in the small room for several minutes after he signed off.  But you won’t be there when I get home.

~ Child? ~~

~~ I know what I’m doing. ~~

*************************

“Do you know what the problem with efficiency is?”  Zared asked as he lounged in the conference room chair, his boots on the table as he used his finger to spin one of the data pads.

Radha spared him a brief, annoyed look.  “What is that youngling?”

“There’s nothing for me to do.”

Well, that wasn’t entirely true.  A few days ago, while the Gehenna engaged the cruisers, Zared and one squad of elite myrmidons, boarded the capital ship, Triumph, and easily made their way to the bridge.  A Captain Gerard was desperately calling for help and firing the ship’s cannons in vain.  So engrossed in surviving, he didn’t see Zared standing behind him, saber engaged, his black boots bloodied.  Tired of being ignored he began picking off the stunned officers on the bridge with nothing but a thought.

Gerard’s eyes filled with terror when he spun to see Zared with his hands on his hips.  “Admiral O . . .” his neck snapped to the side and he puddled to the floor, eyes frozen in fear, blood tricking from his nose.

Zared nodded to his own commander before he turned on his heel, his long black coat, fluid as water, swirling around his boots.  An hour later, he gave the order to destroy the battle group that answered the Triumph’s distress call before resuming his course for Telos.

Commander Hytak had reported he was disappointed with many of the Kath-Sith he found on the worlds Zared had given him to check out.  A pitiful handful had been acceptable.  The rest he executed and destroyed their bases.

Manaan had been a bit more difficult until Zared ordered Captain Wenrif to destroy the Republic embassy and their ships’ hangers.  He reported back a day later that Manaan was now under their rule.  There were pockets of resistance, Selkath, Republic, and Kath-Sith, but he had it under control.

Sleheyron and the tankers bound for Telos were the most satisfying.  “I hope you choke,” he had muttered as he read the reports, thinking of Carth and what he had done to Jaden.  That was two days ago and what he thought would take longer, had been taken care of quickly and efficiently; hence his question to Radha.

“I hadn’t noticed,” the elderly historian said sarcastically.

Zared lazily looked at Radha with a raised brow.  “Any luck on the third key?”

“Not yet.”  The truth was, Radha wasn’t even looking.  He had his assistants going over the information.  He knew Jaden would get the key first.  They would still have to go to Coruscant so a few days wouldn’t matter.  He only hoped Jaden would gather all the artifacts and not just the key.  Those were of the most interest to him after all.

A young man nervously hustled into the room and over to Zared.  He leaned in and whispered something quickly before he backed away.

Zared’s feet slammed to the floor and he shot out of the chair.  “Are you joking?”

“No, Milord,” the young man assured him somewhat distressed that if he wasn’t believed he was dead.  “Captain Ebs is verifying the signal right now.”

Lucian Ebs caught Zared in a good mood and convinced him to “demote” him to captain.  He didn’t want to be an Admiral.  “To much paperwork.”

“Better pay.”

“And benefits.”  Ebs looked Zared straight in the eye.  “Respectfully Milord, I haven’t earned it.  If I’m to properly serve my emperor, I must show my strength as a True Sith.”

Zared nodded.  The man’s unswerving loyalty settled comfortably within him.

He shook off the brief memory as he strode purposely to the comm unit at the end of the conference room.  He paused a moment before pressing the button.  “Darling?  What a pleasant surprise.”

“I need a ride.”

*************************

Jaden found Canderous and Atton in the maintenance bay gearing up.

“Everything okay at home?”  Atton asked quietly.

“If you consider chaos okay.  Zared’s going after Telos.”

“Again?  Third time’s the charm.”

Jaden rolled her eyes.  “He’s hit some of the refineries on Sleheyron and Carth thinks he may go after Vogga the Hutt.  The Republic is sending a detail to Nar Shadda to protect him.”

“The Republic, protecting a crime lord.  Huh,” Atton said frowning.

“Why is Zared going to all that trouble,” Canderous asked.  “Why not just blow up Citadel Station and the planet.”

“Where’s the fun in that,” she said hooking her saber to her belt.  “One of the tactics of the True Sith is to play with their prey.  Another is intimidation.  Create fear and systems will fall in line.  Destroy them and you risk creating martyrs rebels can rally around.  Can’t have that.”  Atton was looking at her curiously when she looked up.  “You didn’t expect the Sith’ari to say something different, did you?”

Atton slowly shook his head as Canderous joined him to watch Jaden head for the loading ramp of the Ebon Hawk.  “What the hell was that about?”

“I’m not sure,” he said as both men followed.  “Let’s just get this done and get the hell outta here.”

*************************

Slorp, slorp, slorp.  They had been slogging along the muddy trail to the temples for the past hour.  Atton’s boots were destroyed, he was sure of it, and his breathing had begun to pace the slorping sounds each step made.  “Ugh!  Why can’t the Sith find worlds like Spira to inhabit.  At least there, there’s a beach and cool breezes.  But nooo, they have to pick a damn jungle where it constantly rains and is muddy.”

“Reminds me of home.” Canderous thought of Dxun.  “The challenge of the environment and the beasts wandering the jungle.”

“Yeah, well it’s ruining my boots and they were expensive,” Atton grumbled.  “Why the hell did they pick here to bury the key?”

“Because this is one of the planets, or moon in this case, that the dark masters claimed as their own.”  Jaden said as she trailed behind Atton.  “And just so you know not all Sith worlds are like this.  The home world of the Sith’ari puts the silly girl’s home of Naboo to shame.”

Canderous exchanged a look with Atton.

“According to history,” Jaden went on, “the ancient Jedi actually built an underground city and used it to change the climate so technically you need to blame yourself for your ruined boots.”  Jaden smiled at him.

“Jaden,” Atton said in a hesitant manner.  Since he couldn’t feel anything from her, it was a little disconcerting.  This was the second time she had said something odd.

“Why did the Jedi build a city if this was a dark world?”  Jaden waved her hand around her.

“Okay, why?”  That wasn’t what he was going to ask but he went with it.

“Think of it as the emergency gift you buy for special occasions.  It wasn’t needed when we claimed it, but it has come in handy to have.”

“We?”

“What?”  She shook her head slightly.  “Anyway,” she went on, “the Jedi abandoned the city, and the moon was basically deserted until Naga Sadow showed up with his Massassi warriors after his defeat during the Great Hyperspace war.

“Despite his Sith alchemic experiments on the warriors, they treated him like a god.  They built the temples and protected him after he put himself in a coma-like state.”

“Why did he do that?”  Canderous asked as he stepped aside so Atton could hack at the trail with his saber.

“Because we allowed it.”

Canderous poked at Atton with the barrel of his rifle.  “I heard,” he mumbled.

“When Freedon Nadd showed up, the Massassi attacked but by using the Force, Nadd convinced them he was worthy and they took the fallen Jedi to Naga Sadow.  Once awake, Sadow taught him all about the Sith.  When he was done, Nadd killed him and claimed the title of Dark Lord.”

“Then how did Freedon Nadd wind up on Dxun,” Canderous asked.  “We didn’t even know his tomb was there until the Exile, Zared, fixed the sensor array.”

“Or that it was crawling with Darth Nihilous’s troops.”  Atton added in a petulant tone.

Jaden smiled at him.  “You did fine, Atton.”

“Thanks to Visas and Mira.”

“On your own as well.”  It was then, standing in the tomb being taunted by the Sith commander, that Atton realized he was slipping back to the dark side and began to reject again what he once was.  “Nadd originally went to Onderon and conquered it, proclaiming himself king.  When he died, he was buried below the palace in Iziz.  His spirit continued to corrupt the citizens until Jedi Master Arca Jeth confronted him toward the end of the Beast War.  Nadd tried to corrupt Jeth but failed.  Jeth moved his body to Dxun.”

“You know, for someone who claims history bores her, you tend to remember it,” Canderous said sarcastically.

“It’s hard to forget what you create,” Jaden said as the three of them stepped from the tree line and into a clearing filled with three massive stone temples.  “The design is unique to Sith architecture.  It focuses dark powers.” 

As she went on ahead, Canderous grabbed Atton’s arm.  “What the hell is going on?”

“I don’t know, but we shouldn’t be here.”

“One of your bad feelings?”

“No,” he looked at Canderous.  “A very, very, very bad feeling.”

“Has she fallen?”

Atton shrugged.  “I don’t know, it like there’s . . .”

“Someone else here.”

“Let’s go boys.  We’re burning day light.”

Both men took a deep breath and followed her to the center temple.  “Get in, get the key, and get out.  That’s the plan,” she said when they flanked her.

“Fine with me.  How do we get in?”  Atton studied the solid stone façade.

“If I remember correctly, the entrance is around the other side,” Canderous answered and began walking away.

Atton took this chance and reached out to grab Jaden’s sleeve.  Cold, like nothing he felt before burned his skin and he jumped back.  “What the hell?  I’d ask if you were all right but it’s obvious you’re not.”

Jaden quickly shook her head and began walking away.  Atton hustled after her and went to grab her again but she spun away.  “Don’t touch me!”  She hissed with a snarl.

“All right, all right.  Let’s just get this over with,” he snapped and walked past her.

“Atton . . . Atton . . . Damnit, Jaq!”

He grimaced against the quick flair of anger.  “What?”

~~ Child, you cannot interfere.  He rightfully belongs to them. ~~

~~ No! They’re using me to set him up.  ~~

“What?”

It was already to late.  Jaden felt the cold knot of darkness fade.  Please don’t give in.  Promise me you won’t.

~~ What a delightful sight to see you fail.  ~~

Atton glared at her before he spun away.