Excerpt 'Light saber to Test

After a few weeks, Master Zhar handed me over to Master Vandar. Vandar was the master of the lightsaber. He was working on what appeared to be such a device as I walked in. 'Sit, I will be ready in a moment.' He said.

I watched him work. His tridactyl hand worked smoothly with the hilt, adjusting some mechanism within it, then he gave a chuff of satisfaction.

'We were concerned about teaching you the lightsaber, young apprentice.'

'I don't understand, Master. I have used a sword before.'

'Yes you have, and that is why we are concerned. You know what a light saber is, yes?'

'It is a collimated beam of energy focused through a crystal which heightens the strength, and limits it's focus.' I replied.

He snorted. 'Reading Master Koori's treatise have you?' He asked.

I shrugged. About sixteen centuries earlier, crystals had been found that directed energy into a forced beam, but at the same time did not let it extend too far from that focus. No one knew why the crystals worked in such a manner, and those who worked in fields affected by this discovery were still arguing to this day.

'The Jedi made the lightsaber because they needed a weapon of last resort.' Vandar said. I understood. As much as they tried to maintain the balance, Jedi did gather enemies. Those that wished more than an agreement had given them, governments that felt their rights were more important, and of course the Sith. We could have walked around armored like heavy infantry troopers, but it's kind of hard to convince people you're only there to help with all of that firepower on your back. But the Jedi of that time had to protect themselves. They had begun with sword back when the Republic was formed, and when virbroblades were invented went to them instead. Then the lightsaber was designed around these rare and valuable crystals.

'What does pure energy weigh?' Vandar asked.

'Nothing, Master.' I replied. The question made no sense.

'Exactly. But a blade, even a vibroblade with just that strip of metal in the center does. That is one reason why a child is easiest to teach. You can hand a child a lightsaber, and he has nothing to compare it to. You however are used to that weight, to having to resist swinging too hard, or too lightly. To stopping the blade in an instant because your muscles are used to it. If I handed you a lightsaber, you would hurt yourself long before you dealt with an enemy.' He flicked a switch, and a set of four small beams shot out to hit a small plate which had been pushed out by the pressure of that light.

'This is the best I could do on short notice, young one. The 'blade' is made of low powered lasers. They can singe the flesh, but will not cut it. The metal piece is light enough that it retreats from light, but is held b a magnetic field so that it cannot go any farther.' He flicked it off, then tossed it in my direction. Using the Force I caught it, and brought it into my open hand. He picked up a solid mask of metal, and flung it at me and I caught it bringing it to my open hand.

'Stand there in the engarde position. Put on the helmet and await further instruction.' I did as I was told. The instant the helmet was on, I could see nothing. Pads covered my eyes so that I could not even try to squint around them. But I could hear, and still feel the Force. There was the greenish white of Master Vandar before me. He stood with both hands on his cane. 'Switch on your weapon.' The blade surprised me, I didn't know until then that energy itself was something the Force could sense. Then I chided myself. I had seen students here walk through a hall with blaster turrets blazing, deflecting the bolts with the very weapons they carried. Of course you could feel energy!

'Now you know from your past how to use a sword. Use this as one.' I slowly began the first Kata I had learned so many years ago from Kalendra. The blade felt odd, and I couldn't explain why.

'There are more complex forms. Use them.'

I began into the saber dance, as a single bladed version among the Echani is called. Part of that requires you to shift your grip, holding the pommel as if it were a knife with the blade down from your hand instead of forward. Then you would progress into what is called the wheel, a defensive spiral of the blade spinning before you to block any attack.

At least in theory. I started to shift my grip and go into the wheel, when I felt a sharp burning sensation in my forearm, then in my knee. I lost control of the weapon, and felt it also score across my chest. I dropped it, gasping.

For a long moment, there was silence. 'I had hoped from what you did at the start that it would all flow so simply. I am sorry for that. But now you see why we worried. You must practice this every chance you get, alone, with others watching, with that blade alone. You must do it with your eyes closed, and if you cannot keep them closed, with the helmet you now wear. Until you have learned this, there can be no going forward.'

'But Malak-'

'As needy as we are, Malak must wait on this.' He replied. 'Go back to your ship.'

As much as they bothered me when I had learned the Force, I found that being around the crew of my ship was more restful than not. I wanted to read but I was worried that I could not handle a simple single blade. What could would I be if I could not bear the weapon of my order?

I went to the Port cargo hold. Canderous had taken over the other, incessantly tinkering with the swoop bike he had somehow gotten aboard. Most everyone else stayed away from him. I looked around the area, and judged I had enough room to dance if the sword would let me.

I burned myself almost hourly for three days. I used up all of the burn salve we had aboard, and Carth ordered more, which was delivered as everything else we had ordered, without complaint. I went to bad hurt, angry and frustrated rather than continue because I knew that while those emotions might speed my actions, they would also draw me away from the light. If I had to be mad to use the blade correctly, what good would I be?

After a while I was burning myself less. Then one day I was thinking about something I had read in the Archive. A book that had not been written on Dantooine, but on Korriban, captured during the Sith war or so long ago. It was a copy of an even older book according to the forward, a book almost as ancient as the Republic itself, which had also been a mere copy of one even older. The wording had been archaic, and hard to read, but something about the wording made a deep impression.

Then they came, the invaders, ripping out places of worship on Dantooine and Korriban among others, placing within them great symbols of their power. Long was the tyranny as they used the Force and matter as one to strike terror into the hearts of all that faced them

I walked into the cargo bay, and ran over what the words had said translated from so long ago. I picked up that damn sword, and began to move in the first Kata.

The seat of their power was the Star Forge, an engine of great might and darkness that grew ships as if they were but animals. That gave them their every want and need, and protected them from attack. Then the plague struck them, many died, and others found they could no longer touch the Force. The Star Forge fell silent, for without the force, a being could not make the controls work.

'Then did the oppressed come, raining fire on them wherever they dwelt, even to the foot of the Star Forge itself, for the weapons that could turn a planet to dust were silent, they would not obey the pleas of those they had once protected.

'Danika.'

'Hm?' I opened my eyes, looking at Bastila. As I did, I saw a flash of light pass less than three centimeters from my face. I did not stop, but instead looked forward. The blade was moving, and I was dancing with it as I had learned. But this blade was that beam of laser lights. I stopped. 'How did I do that?'

'How did you do it without a qualm, without a cut for almost an hour?' Bastila asked.

'I don't know. I had read something that I think might be the clue to what Revan was looking for, and was concentrating on what the words might mean when I started.

'Do not think of that.' She commanded. 'Start again.'

I did as she had bid, my eyes firmly closed. After two hours without a burn she stopped me again. She held her lightsaber. 'Try this, but be careful.'

I took it, and the twin blades sprang from it. Again I closed my eyes. This was easier. I had been training with twin blades since I was a kid, and I knew the nuances of them as well as I knew anything in my life. I began to dance in earnest, the slow glide forward, the whip of the blades past my face as I went into the Water wheel, the variant of the wheel practiced with pair blades-

'Danika.'

-I suddenly knew I had done this before. Not with a paired blade such as this, but with a single blade, the joy of that impression leaped in my heart, and I began to whirl the weapon faster-

'Danika...'

-I had done this somewhere, perhaps in a past life some people speak of. I had been the best and even masters had watched in amazement as I had cut flies from the air, and strips of paper from a sheet held by a volunteer-

'Danika!' I stopped, the blades beside my hip, one forward one back in the low guard position. I opened my eyes. There had been a metal crate before me, one of the empties we hadn't returned to the quartermaster yet. I had cut it in half, not in one blow but in neat strips that lay on the deck, glowing from the heat of the weapon, starting with a wedge of metal, then progressively larger rectangles. I stepped back from it, and my thumb found the stud, and the blades fell silent and vanished. I handed it back to Bastila, and she looked at my handiwork.

'I think you are ready.'

Tests:

Danika

I couldn't wait for some of it. I went to Master Dorak, and showed him the book I had been reading. He pounced on it, and was lost in it before I could do more than explain what I had read. I left him happily engrossed in a time beyond that of the Republic. Both Master Vandar and Master Zhar were away, and I wanted to tell them both what had happened, but of course could not. I was walking back through the corridor when Master Vrook came around the corner. It wasn't until then that I realized that except for watching me from a distance, he had not gotten close to me since the Council meeting of almost two months ago. In fact, while there were fifteen Masters present, only the Council members would even speak to me. I didn't know why, but it was a fact I had to accept.

'How is your training going?' He growled.

'I believe I am ready to work with an actual lightsaber finally.' I admitted.

'Finally.' He motioned, and walked into the training room. He keyed a sensor, and a remote ball glided from it's niche. 'Helmet.' He snapped. I picked it up, and slid it on. 'Saber.' He flipped the handle to me and I caught it without using the force. 'Engarde.'

I flicked it on, and waited in middle guard position. The remote was invisible, only the humming of it's anti-grav unit giving me an approximate position. I moved the blade, and felt a bolt deflect into the wall.

Then they became faster and faster, a rain that would hurt if one of them struck me. The sound of the unit became diffuse, and the rain fell harder and faster. I was untouched, but I didn't know how long that would be true.

Then they came in a flurry, I could have sworn the remote was flying around me but I could no longer hear it.

'Enough!' Master Zhar shouted. The rain stopped. 'Take off your helmet, Apprentice. ' I slid it off, and looked at the five remotes that still circled me. I looked to Master Vrook. He stood beside Zhar, glaring at me with such hate that I was stunned.

'Better than I had ever imagined.' Vrook said softly, then he handed the remote controller to Zhar and padded out. Zhar looked after him for a long moment, then back at me.

'Your final tests begin tomorrow. I would suggest you get a good night's sleep.' Zhar sent the remotes back to their niches, and left. I looked at the lightsaber in my hand, then set it on the desk at the end of the room.

The next morning, I arose early. Bastila who had been working with me when I practiced my training was absent, and part of me missed her. She had become almost like my shadow for the last two months or so. I picked up a mug, accidentally dropped it, and caught it with the Force a few centimeters from the floor.

'Beast having to clean it up doesn't it?' I looked at Mission where she stood. She had begun to smile again but it was a sad smile. The kind a child gets after they find that the monster they thought was under the bed was real, regardless of what their parents said.

'Yes it does. Tea?'

'Sure.' I handed her the filled mug, got another and poured mine. 'So what is it like to use the force?'

'Like finding out you have only taken shallow breaths all your life.' I grinned. 'Or finding out that boys are really attracted to those new growths that bothered you a year before.' She laughed out loud, once again the child without a care. I could see her growing up, having children being happy-

Her face contorted, I could hear her screaming at me to stop, hands raised in supplication rather than defense. As if that would stop me. I blocked a bolt and knew it was Carth, screaming at me to stop. Canderous would do nothing, I knew. He was mine, had been mine since the day he had joined us. Bastila would bend to my will, fall on her knees and proclaim me master. Malak would die, not quickly, but by cut after cut as I sliced away every bit of the betrayer's flesh. I could feel the blade slicing through Mission, watched her fall, heard Zaalbar's scream of rage and pain and betrayal. 'Wait your turn.' I snarled, turning to face him. The bowcaster was up, but his heart warred with his oath and I reached out, feeling his skull collapse in my Force imbued hand-

-'Danika!' I started back, looking at the mug at my feet, shattered. I set down the pot, and sat, shivering with a cold that had nothing to do with temperature. She fussed about me, and I finally had to beg her to sit. 'Please Mission, I'm all right.'

'Well you looked like someone had hit you with a stun baton.'

'It wasn't a stun baton, it was the Force.' I replied. Feet ran up the gangway, and stopped at the passageway to the central room. Bastila came in, eyes wary. Her lightsaber was in her hand, and I knew she was ready to trigger it in an instant.

'Well at least I know you how to roust you out of bed in the morning.' I joked. It had been a running gag among us. Bastila was usually the last awake, and was not by any stretch a morning person. I was almost as bad, but at least they didn't have to threaten me with ice water.

She calmed, but was not amused. Neither was I. 'I felt-'

'I know. I saw a vision. A horrible vision.' I pointedly did not look at Mission. 'I think I have to speak with Master Vandar and Master Zhar right now.'

'They are expecting you even now.' Bastila hung her lightsaber from her belt.

We walked to the Council room in silence. I was still horrified by what the vision had shown me. Mission dying not by chance but by my hand just a few weeks away. How I knew how long in unimportant. Mission had become like a younger sister to me. I wanted to hold her in my arms wipe her tears away. If I could I would have gone to the wreckage of Taris, and put it back like it had been even if it took several lifetimes. I didn't want the Force if I would have to do something like that!

Master Vrook was not there, which made me happy in a vague way. I came up to the other masters, and instead of standing, I fell to my knees and told them everything I had seen during that horrible vision. I told them in a leaden voice, and found myself crying as I did. Part of me would be ripped away in an instant if they judged it necessary. I would go on never feeling the force again, never knowing what I might have been, or done with it.

I didn't care.

I finally ran down. kneeling in silence. 'I can't go on with this if that will happen.' I whispered, 'I can't put their lives in danger not from Malak but from me!' I looked up, barely seeing them through my tears. 'Take this from me, I know you can. Make my mind a blank and fill it as you will, I don't want-' I looked away. '-I don't want to become that person.'

'What makes you think you will asked a gentle voice. I looked back. Somewhere during the recital, Master Vrook had come in. His face was impassive, but in his eyes I could see pain. He walked over, kneeling beside me. 'People go through their lives with choices all around them We who use the Force are most sorely tried because our choices can harm those we love more than ourselves. we always walk that knife blade. Vandar, Zhar,' He laughed softly, 'Even I. Will you listen to me for once?'

'Always, Master.' He looked sad at that.

'The Force can give you visions of the future. But some are not true. They are the potential in all of us, the evil we could do if we do not restrain ourselves. I believe that is what you saw. There will be a time of great test for you before you confront Malak, a time when your entire existence, and all of ours will rise or fall on what you do. You must be strong for all of us. For this Twi-lek girl, for the Wookie, even for the Mercenary who you now have following you like a tame Kath hound. You will send them to hell, or save their lives with your actions.'

I nodded jerkily, then I hugged him, burying my head against his chest as I cried. I felt his discomfort, and one of his hands patted me jerkily. 'Now no more of this. Master Zhar awaits your final tests.'